Snip it from latest piece..
It was a saturday night and everything felt perfect. They lied there, listening to the wave’s crash against one another, as they starred up at the stars. She saw a hermit crab scamper away out of the corner of her eye. She glanced at her watch and realized the time. The curly-haired girl slowly started to lift herself off of his chest. She sat up straight and he followed.
Keep writing in third person, or rewrite to make it first person?
I would personally like it better in first person, it would make it seem more like you are witnessing it, and making it more real, rather than just talking about it. Unless you are going for the looking back perspective, then it's fine in third.
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